Today marks the 18th anniversary of the day I lost one of my closest friends, Lori Michelle Martin. It's so hard to believe that 18 years have already passed. I remember the day just like it was yesterday.
Labor Day weekend, 1992 I was heading back home that Monday from a trip to the beach with another friend of mine. All day I tried reaching my parents on the phone, but had no luck. I even tried calling my line but got no answer and my answering machine didn't pick up either... strange. I tried and tried but no one was answering their phone. I tried my grandparents phone, no answer. This now got me a little worried that something had happened to a family member because they always answered the phone and it seemed as if they never went anywhere. The closer I got to the house, the more I tried calling every number I could think of to get someone on the phone who knew what was happening with my family. About 15 minutes from the house, I decided to call Lori's house to see if maybe my parents were with her Mom and maybe the "beach" crowd had gotten together for a Labor Day Cookout. So, I'm calling Lori's house and my Mom answers the phone, strange. She sounded fine, but very limited in what she had to say to me. In fact, all I really remember her saying was can you please come by Lori's house before heading home. I was so relieved to hear my Mom's voice, but also agitated at the time I had spent trying to get in touch with her. I told her I was tired and needed to get laundry done so I would just meet them at the house. My Mom insisted that I come by Lori's house and then I knew something wasn't quite right. I asked my Mom what was going on and why she couldn't just tell me what she needed to over the phone. I was tired and cranky and just wanted some answers but my Mom was also loosing her patience with me, so I dropped it and just decided to swing by Lori's.
I got off on the exit and I clearly remember the song playing as I pulled up in Lori's gravel driveway. It was the song Please Don't Go by KWS. To this day, I can't stand that song. It takes me back to what seemed like the longest driveway in history where I saw lots of friends, and family and cars everywhere. I still don't think it registered that something was wrong. In fact, I just figured, it's labor day so everyone is here for a cookout. There were friends there that I had not seen since high school, so why I thought everything was copacetic was beyond me. My Dad met me in the driveway before I even had a chance to park the car and I could tell by his face that something was very wrong. It was the first time in my life that I had ever seen my Dad get teary eyed. He asked me to get out of the car and as he grabbed me tightly he said, "I can't believe I have to tell you this, but Lori is dead". I literally fell to the ground, screaming, crying, hitting my Dad in the chest as my Mom began to walk out of the house to help. I was uncontrollably screaming "WHAT HAPPENED, WHAT HAPPENED". At this point, I just figured it was an automobile accident, even though now I remember seeing her car sitting in the driveway, so that just couldn't be the case. I never in a million years thought I would hear what would come out of my Dad's mouth next... "Shelley, Lori was shot this afternoon. It was an accident, "K" was cleaning his gun when it accidentally went off". I didn't believe it then and I don't believe it now, nor do I ever think I will ever believe it was an accident. I don't know that it was intended to happen that day, but I do believe it also wasn't an accident either.
A few weeks before the gun went off on this dreadful Labor Day, "K" had "accidentally" shot himself in the same house with another gun. The bullet pierced through his hand and luckily no one in the house was hurt. Maybe I've been watching too much TV, but I believe this was all part of his plan. If he could show that one gun went off accidentally, then why couldn't another one do the same a few weeks later. There were also things that didn't jive with me in regards to the way "K" described to me what happened. Lori was sitting across the room from "K" at an angle that doesn't make sense how she could then be shot underneath her arm. If the bullet had hit the other side of her body, I might have bought it, but in my opinion, in order for her to have been shot from where she would have been sitting, "K" would have had to have been right by her side. "K" knew about guns, he knew the safety of guns and he knew not to clean his gun with a bullet in the chamber. In my opinion, Lori was really ending things with him that day, one thing lead to another, their argument got out of control and he shot her.
My Mom would later tell me that Lori had called me the morning of her death. Was she calling because she was in trouble, or was it just a call to say hello? I'll never know! I think back to the last time I saw Lori, in that same driveway where I got the awful news of her death. She yelled to me as I was walking to my car "I'll talk to you later this week". I remember the feeling I had as I turned to tell her to "Take Care", it was like that would be the last of our goodbyes. I think we all have those premonitions, but sometimes don't know exactly how to bring them to light or question why they occur in the first place. Could things have been different if I had been home that day and gotten her call? Would the circumstances have been the same or would she still be here today? Again, I'll never know.
RIP my friend. I think of you often and think of those you left behind. I know I speak for us all when I say, we miss you!
